Nuthin Much

A lady threw herself in front of a moving subway this morning. So, of course, this caused the shutdown of the entire subway system in Vancouver for the better part of the day. Undoubtedly, people react with the how could she do this to me attitude, as opposed to the how awful … attitude. *sigh* ~ its all about me, that’s how I find most people. And … mostly unaware. Though, its trying to tolerate, I can only feel sorry for those who demonstrate themselves pre-operationally egocentric, I suppose. As I wonder, what agony drove this woman to end her life so violently? Did she find herself regretting her decision to throw herself in front of the train, but only too late? Did she feel afraid, in the nanoseconds before her death? Did she ask for forgiveness … for such an act of cowardice and carnage? That’s not for me to judge, I know. Still … I wonder about such things. I wonder about other humans ~ like … wonder what makes them tick. Too bad more humans have forgotten to wonder.

A few posts back, I wrote a post based on a speech I heard Giorgio di Cicco give at a televised conference. One of the ideas he expressed involved sullenness on peoples’ faces as an index that must be read. Well, don’t you find people embroiled in such deep despair that they rage? Don’t you see the rage in society as an index which we must begin to read? I do. The west has too much … and yet not enough. All at once. We behave like dumb, patronizing sheep. Or magpies ~ following the shiny objects. We’d pluck each other’s eyes out, because they look like that shiny bauble we want. Want? Why? Because. Because, why? Because … we can. This constant faceless desire, lust for power, and egocentric approach to life will certainly spell humanity’s demise … at some point in the future. *sigh*

Anyways …

You’ll notice the new header. Like it? Yet another photo-choppy … by yours truly. If you go to the lullabies for cerberus blog you’ll see a new header there, too. I disabled the funky mouseover script i had goin’ on here, for now. Just for now. Yeah ~ it seems I’m on a Photoshop jag. I suppose that’s where all the creative energy’s going to, these days. I’m still reading Dante … though my pace has slowed … and still reading Dostoevsky (Brothers Karamazov), and still poking through St. Augustine’s Confessions. I think I will revisit a book I have on my shelf ~ The Trouble with Islam ~ a book written by a Muslim woman/journalist here in Canada. It’s a genuine and balanced portrayals of Islam with references to the Qu’ran … and her take on the whole extremist phemonemon. Its a book written by a woman who still believes in the merit her faith system … just has trouble reconciling the direction some appear to want to take it.

Its a similar thing many Christians struggle with these days ~ questioning one’s religious context and/or background. When I read the book, for the first time about 2 years ago, it actually inspired me to find out more about my own religion. Know why we’re such sheep here? Coz we really know jack shit about the things we should have great knowlesge. Its pitiful, how obtuse and impatient technology has made us – particularly that photon-box that gives its viewers square eyes. And the crap that actually makes it to those airwaves. And that people lap it up, like a thirsty hound laps up water from his dish. I find myself tiiiiiiirrrreeeed of hearing Islam-bashing. Rather that climb in the mud pit with the bashers and the brawlers I choose to take the intellectual approach: learn about the things of which I know little. I used to feel absolutely compelled to vehemently address the disagreeables, to convert their ways of thinking. But, the most intolerant typically have grown that way over time … and their attitudes have firmly taken root. And stirring the pot really does little but create friction and dissension.

Okay. That’s my lamest post ever, I think. Well … ok. Just look at the pretty header. And just think … TGIF! Wishing everyone a great weekend.


~ by frizzyscissorhands on September 21, 2007.

4 Responses to “Nuthin Much”

  1. The new header/banner is very eye catching. I noticed right away.

    And of course, the kitty is adorable. I scratched!

    Dostoevsky, as well as the rest of the great Russians, were so far ahead of their time. I’ve been reading Crime and Punishment, as well as a huge anthology of Russian short stories by all the masters. Gogol is also great. So is Chekhov, of course…

    I agree about the religions. And I have to say everyone forgets that all three–Christianity, Islam and Judiasm all believe in one god called God, however that happens to be pronounced in the respective languages is immaterial. One god, one book. That’s the heart that so many over look.

    Take care, Matissa.

  2. The last paragraph reminds me of B.F. Skinner. Try as we might to distinguish ourselves from the ‘lower’ orders, humans are still organisms responding to stimuli. True, the stimuli we can perceive is far more abstract. But still, the reaction is the same.

    As for the latent anger in society, I don’t think there’s a better example than road rage. The environment of driving, for some reasons, relaxes the inhibitions that many people have with respect to expressing anger. Sure, the rage is elsewhere in society, but I can’t think offhand of a place where it’s more obvious.

    I kinda see suicide as an aggressive act not just against the individual involved (after all, it is self-murder), but against society as well. Out of all the ways this person could have offed herself, she chose one in which she could cause as much misery as she could probably conceived, not the least of which were the train’s personel, who will now have to go through the rest of their lives burdoned with the realization that they caused another person’s death.

  3. x-dell ~ indeed, so true. road rage ! a classic example of the “index of society” … and i agree with you on the sentiment behind suicide ~ its really quite violent. misery loves company, they say …

    i cannot imagine what it must be for anyone who saw her actually jump on the track and get crushed by the train … the trains here are un-manned, meaning a computer drives them, not a human … but there is a seat that looks out to the track – at the front of the train . .. where one can see all.

    that would traumatize me, for sure it would. how awful for whomever had to deal with the carnage … and clean it off the tracks. how awful for her family, who would have to receive her body for burial.

    as for people … those with little awareness of themselves seem like the poster child for the stimulus-response thing.

  4. I guess I’m sorta New-York-centric. Still, I get your point about the trauma to witnesses, especially if one or more were children.

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